now that boo has gone back to school, it has hit me.
i am mindnumbingly, soulstompingly lonely. moving twice in two years, and staying home all week with a baby has finally gotten to me.
i was really looking forward to connecting with some of the parents at boo's new school, and it isn't happening. not only is it not happening, but at a coffee morning last week, i actually felt quite snubbed. i looked around the room and saw that everyone had gotten paired off into conversation, except me. someone had started talking with me, and before i could even respond fully, she gave me the 'uh-huh' nod had turned to someone else. i waited for about 8 minutes, and left without saying anything further. i am now avoiding people in the halls.
i barely see my neighbors, and i'm feeling awkward around a couple of them anyway. next door, we had given them a wedding present that they have yet to verbally acknowledge - which is all i'm looking for, i don't expect a written thanks - and across the street, we made them sorbet out of the cherries they brought over before their month-long trip out of town, so they wouldn't miss their own fruit. i mean, just tell me if you liked it. or return my tupperware. or something.
i'm basically crying a lot, and anything tips me over right now. i hold myself together long enough to get boo into his classroom, and to pick him up and spend the afternoon with him, but that's about it.