boo was invited to play with our across-the-street neighbor today, and they had a great time sharing time on a swing, making mudpuddles and playing in damp sand. i held bea and got to chat with the mom. it was very nice and relaxing.
between this, last night's wine tasting, and the network of spiritual progressives meeting yesterday evening, i am starting to feel a little more connected. it's been five months-ish since we moved to this house, and 14 months since we moved to portland. for some reason i'd been feeling a little down lately: unconnected, not feeling certain about spilling my guts to anyone, and wondering if i;d become too guarded to spill my guts anyway. or too guarded to *have* guts, and just living a fairly surface-level life.
for someone who is kinda loud, i'm fairly introverted, and i sometimes fear being tolerated versus being truly liked. actually, i feel like much of my awkward childhood/adolescent was in the state of being bemusedly tolerated instead of liked, and when i get a little down i feel like i'm right back there.
having a couple of just nice interactions really helped lift that cloud. now i wonder if that cloud is fairly normal.